Yesterday’s Water: a short and silly essay that’s all wet

I found a full cup of water I’d left out from yesterday. I picked it up, looked at it, took a sip and discovered, “Yep, it’s still water.”

Instead of plastic bottles, I drink from cups of tap water. I bring them in my car when I travel. I don’t understand why people buy water when they have water from their sink, already purified. If there are minerals in it, they’re good for us. If there’s chlorine, we can buy a filter. Filling tons of bottles (that fill tons of landfill) with water just seems pointless to me.

The names of the water bottling companies crack me up. A bottle may be labeled “Tahitian waterfall bubbling babbling spring water.” But the small disclaimer is likely to say “Purified water, bottled in Detroit.”

This is America. We are the most anally sterile country in the world. We’re so isolated from impurities that we get Montezuma’s revenge when we go to Mexico because our bodies scream, “My god, is that a germ?” and shut down in horror.
Yes of course I’m all for clean water. I’m just saying “It IS clean for peep’s squeak!” People want a new level of clean. Putting it in a sky blue bottle with a picture of the Bahamas doesn’t make it any cleaner. And then there’s the boutique glass bottle with the zen label and haiku. Yes, you too, can achieve enlightenment, for only $2.99. Buy two, get one free, Nirvana is yours my friend! Still just purified water.

I’m wondering what’s next. Perhaps a crystal water goblet with a 14 carat gold pop-top which comes in a burgundy velvet pouch.

That’s all I have to say on the subject. I’m going to sit down now and finish drinking yesterday’s water. I just have to pick that fly out of it first.

Hello from Christchurch NZ!

Hello from beautiful, green New Zealand!

I’m in a lovely cafe in Christchurch, having one of their wonderful tarts– feta and spinach, and the Kiwis sure know how to make a melt-in-your-mouth flaky crust!

Though Christchurch was horribly damaged in the earthquake last year, the spirit of this town is undefeated. The shops that were destroyed are thriving in an incredibly creative makeshift mall made of shipping containers, painted bright colors and with glass doors and windows. There is a charm here, not even a “stiff upper lip,” but a true joyful dedication to the task at hand, of rebuilding this beautiful city. A city where the shallow Avon river ripples and shimmers as the boats glide along, with the proud captains punting in their straw hats like something out of Mary Poppins.

My show is going well. I had a wonderful standing room only crowd the other night, where passengers sat, lined up and down the stairs because the chairs were all filled! I took two solid hours of requests before taking a quick break, not to get some water, but to sign CDs. Delightful people!

My Halloween production went very well October 31st, complete with four dancers, props, a fog machine and incredible lighting! Can’t wait for the Trade show in January, where I can push my new Halloween CD!

Bye for now!


Hello from Sydney!

I’m in an Internet cafe in Sydney, Australia! The first segment of the cruise is finished, and today we set off around Australia with a new group of passengers.

The first order of business when stepping onto the magical land of Australia is to rush into the nearest cafe and ask the vital question, “Do you have any pies?”
They don’t hand you an apple pie or a cherry pie. You get a scrumptious, flaky, melt-in your mouth meat pie. Mine was beef with wine sauce. Dee-lish!

I have been going through internet withdrawal, and it took four attempts, even in the thriving metropolis of Sydney, to get proper internet. The pie shop had internet, but it was not working. The Starbucks was closed. The McDonalds, whom the locals all said to go to, had such slow internet I couldn’t Skype. The trick is, to go to an actual Internet store, pay by the hour, and get hardwired. Now I’m happy as a clam. YES the Opera House is out there, and the harbor in all its magnificence, but when you’ve been away a month like I have, the most precious thing of all is “Hi everybody! I’m alive and well– how about you?” And catching up on all the stuff. So I say a very warm “G’Day” to all of you, and I’m going to get back to Skype. “See” you at the next port!

Hello from Honolulu!

Sitting at the Bikini Cafe at the Aloha Tower in Hopnolulu! I just went for an awesome submarine ride, saw sunken ships and airplanes, parrot fish, barracudas, and my favorite, humuhumu nukunuku apua a! Theyr’e so cute! But they also bite!

I’ve had a wonderful crowd aboard the Sea Princess, sometimes standing room only! I’m also teaching a choir, and they’re doing such a great job!

Kawaii tomorrow! For now, back to my $2 taco! Good stuff!

Mastering a CD in a hotel!

Eight days until I sail out of San Francisco! That means eight days to finish my CD!

As life would have it, we have moved out of one home, and will be moving into a new one in May, when I return. And so I find myself in a hotel, surrounded by my stripped-down recording studio, my keyboard, and a cup of coffee, with a looming deadline– I can’t bring my studio on board the Sea Princess! My husband is in Europe right now, which means– one: I MISS YOU ANTHONY!!! and two: I can work to the wee hours without keeping him awake.

I’ve managed to do my master mixes with no complaints by the other hotel guests, but today I need to sing some vocals. I wonder what my neighbors will think? When I’m singing through headphones, all they will hear is my voice, “tra-la-la”-ing through the halls! I have often said, “If you can’t find a hammer, use a rock.” And so I say to all out there, “Yes you CAN record an album in a hotel room.” One of my speakers is hanging over the kitchen sink, the other is propped up by a box of CDs on a dresser. Just thought you’d like a visual– it’s quite funny!

Well, if I can record an album in a hotel room, I think I can do just about anything. Today I will be singing a tune I’ve written called “Howling at the Moon.” In case you’re wondering, I’m recording a (not just for) Halloween album! Complete with a sassy version of Monster Mash, Spooky, Werewolves of London, Jar of Hearts, I Put a Spell on you, and four of my originals. I made a video of “Mr. Bag o Bones”– check out the extended version on my video page, or you can see the shorter video on my Rose Winters youtube channel.

Okay, enough chatting, I have three more songs to finish, and eight days left, and somewhere in there I need to pack for my three month trip to the South Seas!

Thanks for tuning in, I’m very grateful that you’re here on my web page! Feel free to send me an email on my contact page, I’d love to say “hey!” XO